*Edit April 2017* I was wrong! See my latest post about my IBS here - at time of writing I’m 60 days symptom-free and I’ve done it 100% through diet.
Some of you may know I love a good detox - it all started when I stopped using shampoo almost a year ago and the benefits I noticed were just so great that my interest in natural health has since spiralled totally out of control - and my body is rewarding me in so, so many ways.
So today it’s about to get a bit up close and personal, but if you’re here right now you must know what to expect when we’re talking about IBS.
And trust me, I wouldn’t be writing about any of this for the world to see if I hadn’t noticed any dramatic changes to my health in the last few months but here I am, and here you are, so let’s stop giggling about the thought of discussing poo and get on with it:
So, I’ve had chronic constipation since I was a toddler, and since my teens I’ve been repeatedly fobbed off as part of the “IBS” crew. A prescription laxative was handed to me now and then, I was told to take a Buscopan when I was doubled over in agony, and off I was sent on my miserable way.
Sound familiar?
Then gluten-free diets became all the rage, and after cutting it out I felt like a different person within a week, actually able to get out of bed in the morning.
Soon after that I cut out caffeine, and its stimulating effects stopped giving me upset tum.
Then I discovered FODMAPs, and cut out a whole new group of fresh fruit and vegetables, with amazing success at avoiding flair ups.
But a year and a half later I still wasn’t able to reintroduce any of these whole foods, and eating out was becoming a nightmare.
And there’s where I started to get a bit miffed.
So I started scouring the web for possible causes and cures: did I have Candida? Leaky Gut Syndrome? Would I need to go on the even more restrictive GAPS or SCD diets? My head was spinning and my tummy was rumbling.
I didn’t want to embark on any radical diet without proper guidance, which is around the time I discovered what the difference between a dietitian and a nutritional therapist is.
Nutritional therapy is officially a complementary therapy and practitioners believe that there is an undeniable link between food, nutrition, gut health, overall health and disease cure/prevention.
The term ‘nutritional therapist’ is not protected by UK law so standards within the industry can vary. However, having decided that I no longer trusted The System to figure out what the hell was wrong with me, I tracked down my nearest therapist.
And as it turned out she was a colonic hydrotherapy specialist, who would have her work cut out convincing me that the only way to fix my gut was to have the contents of my butt flushed, but hey, you’ve guessed it - I went for it.
Consultation
We went through my symptoms and I received a briefing on diet, water, digestion, intestines - the works. A lot of it was new to me but I was up for trying anything.
I’m just going to say right now that of course I know that every person is going to tell you something different based on what they’re trying to sell you.
But I also knew by this point that being chemical-free across my personal care and cleaning products was doing wonders for my health, and so accepting that an 80% alkaline diet is the best thing for our guts wasn’t a giant leap.
Basically, an “alkaline diet” means eating more vegetables and less “inflammatory” foods like white rice, bread, pasta etc. (basically anything refined) and for me personally even fruit.
Over time I’ve found that ketogenic/low-carb, high-fat/full-on zero carb diets are much more useful to me than “alkaline” or even Paleo templates (basically high amounts of meat and negligible amounts of carbs from all sources, including veg), but for now let’s remember that I didn’t know any of that yet.
So I grabbed a box of probiotics and aloe vera gel (Yes, to drink. Yes, it tastes disgusting. No, I wouldn’t recommend it to others.) and started on my “homework” for a couple of weeks before my first session began.
Sessions 1-5
The process was long and slow for my first few sessions, showing just how dry and impacted the matter in my gut had been.
But in the third session it all got a bit exciting and my therapist said that these were “proper colonics” that an average constipated person has.
Honestly you would not believe - in the third session I lost about 5lb within the hour and overall I’ve lost over a stone - in poo!?
Note: My overall weight didn’t really change because you absorb some of the water that gets put in - so I wouldn’t say this is a quick fix weight loss option but should rather be seen as part of an overall health programme.
After my fifth session I decided to switch colonic specialists just to find one much closer to home. She happens to also be medically trained and in my next three sessions told me some fascinating stuff about the gut and about my own problems.
Other detox protocols
Besides eating a vegetable-heavy diet and going for colonics I was drinking 2-3 litres of water a day, I massaged my problem areas when my gut was sluggish and I did very gentle exercises like walking and yoga most days.
I also took a prebiotic and a probiotic every day for a long time, one for fibre and one to kill Candida - seriously have a read up on Candida, you will be horrified by how many ailments it causes, it ain’t just thrush y’know.
The probiotics and prebiotics I took were by a company called OptiBac - I wouldn’t normally feel comfortable recommending specific supplement companies but it’s very difficult to know what a “good quality” one looks like, so I feel like I can at least mention them so you can look into them further.
The good stuff
So! What were the health benefits I noticed from all that?
Even more awareness of dietary cause-and-effect
Cutting down on refined foods even further turned out to be nothing short of eye opening.
I realised that things like eating too much chocolate (even raw) led to unbearable foot and leg cramps followed by a painful, hollow hunger the following morning - plus irritability.
These were symptoms I’d often suffered from throughout my entire life, and I was finally able to pinpoint that eating too much sugar gave me symptoms associated with Candida and insulin resistance - had I been putting myself at risk of Type 2 diabetes my entire life??
And of course it’s easy to use chocolate as the example, but I stumbled across this fascinating article about other foods that can contribute to diabetes and funnily enough my diet used to be rich in all of them, same as most people’s today.
With pre-diabetes becoming a growing problem it’s all food for thought, IMHO.
My skin has kinda started glowing
I’m as pale as they come. I don’t even possess that lovely even porcelain complexion, I’m just pasty and translucent and always have been.
But the first two colonics left me feeling like my face had evened out just that little bit more than usual, and Graeme was laying it on thick with the compliments.
Then, suddenly, after my third session I came back to the office on Monday and two friends literally stopped their conversation to ask me where I’d been over the weekend because I looked brown.
People were asking me where I’d been? Me, the girl who came back from week-long holidays in the Med every year to school friends asking me why I hadn’t tanned, brown??
Of course I’m not bloody mahogany or anything so before and after photos would be completely useless, but you get the idea - it was a noticeable change to those who knew me best.
HOWEVER, I also switched to eating locally grown, fresh vegetables from our farm shop and noticed that I started to assimilate a lot more nutrients from my food - you might be interested in reading about what happened to my nails here - so I’m actually hopeful that 2016 might just be the first ever year that I get a tan…
Watch this space!
Update December 2016: It was and it wasn’t. I didn’t burn nearly as easily as I used to, and I got a tiiiiny watchstrap tan line, but that was about it.
Maybe 2017 will be my year 😉
My body has changed shaped
If you have IBS you’ll know what I mean when I say that even though I’m skinny, I’ve always had a bloated stomach.
I’d always affectionately called it my “muffin top”. Yeah, larger people really loved me for that.
But by the third and fourth colonic sessions, my faithful old friend was just kind of… gone.
I don’t really know how to describe it, but my sides have become thinner (as if that was even possible), I’ve dropped a jean size and without doing a single sit up I have my “V” back - you know, that V going down towards your pubic bone?
Also, the excess padding on my butt has disappeared. I always liked my big butt, but it’s definitely looking perkier these days.
It’s truly fascinating stuff.
By the way, I didn’t do any of this trying to lose weight because for my height I’m on the lanky side and for whatever reason no amount of junk food has ever made me put on weight.
“Lucky bitch,” you might say. You wouldn’t be the first. But skinny doesn’t necessarily mean healthy, I definitely suffer from some kind of gut permeability and malabsorption, and with my desk job and poor diet I truly believe I was putting myself at risk of developing diabetes.
No one worries about your health if you’re a “skinny bitch”, and it’s crap to think that there are thousands of other slim people out there headed down the same path.
And of course - the pooping
After 28 years of chronic and often painful constipation, I’m finally regular - that might not be a big deal for some people, sure, but to a person with IBS-C I cannot tell you how much all this information might mean to them.
So, IBS folk, what now?
I can’t tell you what’s going to work for you: 1) I’m not qualified to and this is all my own personal success story and 2) even if I were qualified we are all so unique in our issues that it would be stupid to even try.
What I will say though is that despite switching to a lower carb, *no processed/refined food* diet and upping my water, there is simply no way I could have fixed my bloating and constipation without colonic hydrotherapy, because my bowel was just that impacted.
Yes, I felt a thousand times better on an “anti-inflammatory diet”, but I can’t tell you how much further I’ve come since clearing my poor bowel out.
Sure it might be embarrassing, but when it comes to your health there’s no point in being all British about it.
The main thing I’ve learned from all this is that good health is never a quick fix, and it takes a lot of willpower to change something like your diet so completely.
My new colonic specialist thinks it could take a year to fully heal my gut, but the smallest things have knocked it back in 2016 that it may be years before I feel truly healed.
That’s a long time to abstain from eating too much “fun stuff”, but hey, my palate has completely changed so I won’t be going back after this anyway.
I’m not interested in hearing your excuses about “not being able to” give up bread and cake and chocolate and milk; if you want to carry on eating shit, you crack on, your health is not my problem.
However I’ve taken full responsibility and control of my own health, and as well as the bloating, cramps and constipation, I don’t get these other ailments anymore:
- headaches
- migraines
- spot breakouts
- dry skin
- oily T-zone
- foot cramps
- hollow hunger
- sore throat
- phlegm
- blocked nose
- weak nails
- unexplained bruises
- horrendous morning breath
- dark yellow urine
- frequent colds
- fevers
- lethargy
You know the times I do? When I’m naughty and eat a piece of cake. Or too many vegetables. For real.
I don’t “deprive” myself all the time - but I really pay for my indulgences, and I’m the only one to blame for that.
But that’s pretty empowering, right? That I can now control how my body feels just through what I put on my plate?
Peace, love and health to you all.
*Edit April 2017* See my latest post about my IBS here - at time of writing I’m 60 days symptom-free and I’ve done it 100% through diet.
Disclaimer
• Your life and health are your own responsibility.
• Your decisions to act (or not act) based on information or advice anyone provides you—including me—are your own responsibility.
